The Namesake

by Sophie

March 2003, Firthness Challenge Entry

Rated PG


William Collins was the happiest man alive, he thought one morning as he walked to Rosings Park. He had his uniformly charming wife, Charlotte, and now he had his beloved son. The boy, yet to be named, was born of Charlotte the day before. And now he was on his way to tell his noble patroness, Lady Catherine de Bourgh. This was not the only reason for calling, though; he had a question of the highest import to ask as well.

Walking along the track and entering the gates that led to the splendour of Rosings, he thought up how to approach the question in his head. Before he knew it he had reached the main entrance and was just about to knock when the doors flew open. Being shown in to the sitting room where Lady Catherine greeted all her guests, he made himself relax slightly.

“Mr Collins! Please accept my congratulations on the birth of you son.” Lady Catherine was before him bearing her usual condescending sneer.

“My thanks, my Lady, Charlotte will be…”

“How is Mrs Collins? I trust that she gave birth well? Who was the doctor present? I shall be most exceedingly displeased if it were not Dr Jones.” She sat herself in the chair at the centre of the room, overlooking her guest with her usual superior manner.

The conversation (if it could be called that) carried on in this manner for quite some time. Lady Catherine, who so dearly loved to hear the sound of her own voice, talked more to herself as she glanced up at the ceiling. When at last she paused, Mr Collins took the opportunity to ask his request.

“I was wondering, your ladyship, if I may take some time away to visit my fair cousins. I was hoping to tell them of my good fortune in person.” He mopped his sweaty brow with his handkerchief.

“Well of course you must, only make sure you choose the right one. Your second eldest cousin is a wily one indeed. She has stolen my nephew away from me and I am still most exceedingly displeased. I should not talk to that unfeeling, selfish girl again if I were you.” She glared at him through her beady eyes. Staring down her nose was one of the things she did best.

“Be assured Lady Catherine, I shall pay no such visits…”

“Good. How long shall you be away? I hope that you have found a suitable replacement during your visit. I should be most seriously displeased should the Sunday sermon be of an inappropriate nature.” She looked out of the window and stuck her nose in the air.

“I assure you a temporary replacement of the highest standard shall be found to meet your approval, Lady Catherine. As always, I thank you for your gracious hospitality but I fear I must say my farewells,” he said obsequiously. With that, he stood and bowed low down in front of his noble patroness and left the room.

On the way home, he stopped and thought about what Lady Catherine had said about his second eldest cousin, Elizabeth. Going to see her was a great risk, he was sure, but well worth taking, he assured himself. He thought back to back to when his uncle, Thomas Bennet had written to him. He could recall the letter word for word. He repeated it aloud to himself.

“Dear Sir. I must trouble you once more for congratulations. Elizabeth will soon be the wife of Mr Darcy. Console Lady Catherine as best you can. But if I were you, I would stand by the nephew. He has more to give.”

He slowly began to walk along the path again and thought more on the subject. Now that he had a son, prevailing himself on Mr Darcy wasn’t such a bad idea. He had made up his mind. He would go to Pemberley to see his fair cousin and her illustrious husband. He had a specific request to ask of them.

As the carriage pulled up to the entrance of the vast estate of Pemberley, he thought more on how to ask his ‘favour’. He had written to Elizabeth Bennet Darcy the week previous detailing his intended visit and might also have let slip about his question. Mrs Darcy had written back shortly after and confirmed the arrangements. He was proud that his fair cousin was taking the role of Mistress of Pemberley very seriously indeed.

Drawing up to the stairway leading to the main house, he saw Mr and Mrs Darcy awaiting him by the doorway. As soon as the carriage was brought to a halt, they descended the stone steps. Mrs Darcy looked very gracious indeed on the arm of her very rich husband, he thought to himself. As soon as he had exited the carriage, he bowed very low in front of his esteemed hosts.

“Mr Collins, I hope you are well after your journey?” Mrs Darcy was kindness itself in William Collins’ eyes. So generous of her to ask of his health after such a long journey.

“I thank you my dear cousin, I am indeed very well.” He bowed before her once again, completely missing the humoured look between the new wed couple. Mr Collins straightened and looked up to a very stern looking Mr Darcy.

“Mr Darcy, once again, thank you for letting me visit your beautiful home. I only wish that my beloved Charlotte could be here to see it also.” He looked wistfully towards the sky as he spoke.

“It is my pleasure, Mr Collins. How are Mrs Collins and the young master Collins?” Darcy spoke with his usual authoritative tone, causing Elizabeth to smile.

“She is in the best of health, sir, I thank you. My young son is also perfectly well. Your Aunt, Lady Catherine de Bourgh, is also perfectly fine, sir.” Mr Collins smiled a greasy smile as he looked up at his host.

“Shame,” Darcy muttered under his breath. Mr Collins’ smile disappeared but before any more questions could be asked, Lizzy grabbed her husband’s arm and gestured that they should enter the house. Mr Collins didn’t see Darcy flinch when his wife violently pinched his arm.

“…And this is the sitting room. So, what do you think, Mr Collins?” Lizzy and Darcy hovered in the doorway as William Collins looked around his very wealthy host’s house.

“Rosings Park is nothing compared to this, my dear Mrs Darcy. It is an extraordinarily splendid house. I am very much in awe.” He stood and turned on the spot, staring at the fine décor before him.

“I fear my Aunt’s taste differs from my own. She tends to show off whereas I just want a comfortable home for my family.” He smiled warmly at Lizzy and kissed the back of her hand. Mr Collins averted his eyes. Lizzy blushed slightly but was enjoying the feel of her husband’s lips on her bare skin too much to care.

“Yes, this is a very fine house indeed, Mr Darcy. I am sure you will be spending a lot more time here now you have my fair cousin as your wife.” He smiled at the couple in the doorway.

“Yes, I have neglected Pemberley somewhat these past couple of years and will be glad to spend more time here now. My staff were quite sure I would never settle down. But I find that being married is one of the most sensible things I have ever done, considering my choice of partner.” Lizzy flushed once again and walked into the centre of the room to join her cousin.

“So you have seen the house, the gardens you shall see tomorrow as I know how much you like the outdoors. What would you like to do now, Mr Collins?”

“I think I would like to freshen up before dinner. It has been a very long day indeed and I am sure you have other matters to attend to.” He smiled fawningly at Lizzy.

“I cannot speak for my wife, but I have lost my desk to the paperwork and so perhaps I should start on that. Mrs Darcy has made me quite lazy, I’m afraid.” Darcy smiled his devastating, dimpled smile at his wife.

“I fear you may have been like that before, Mr Darcy, but yes your work does call you as does mine. I shall show you to your room, Mr Collins, so that you may relax for a while.” All three exited the room.

As they sat at the very large dinner table that evening, Mr Collins was thinking about when and how to pose his question. This was going to take some broaching but having seen for himself Darcy’s changed demeanour and his improved sense of humour, he knew no bad would come of asking. He felt assured he would get the desired response from his host. After the meal they removed to the sitting room. There was only Mrs Darcy so Mr Darcy didn’t see the point in going to his drawing room. They all sat in the sitting room inspected previously. Lizzy and Darcy sat together, almost touching but not quite. Mr Collins sat opposite them.

“Why do you not play for us, Elizabeth?” Darcy took her hand while he posed his request.

“I shall if you like. I believe you and your cousin requested me do that same thing at Rosings last spring.” She smiled archly at him, waiting for his response. She did enjoy teasing him so much.

“Yes, you did, Mr Darcy, I remember quite vividly. You do play very well, my dear cousin.” He bowed slightly before her as she rose to take her place at the pianoforte. As she began to play her husband’s favourite piece of music, Voi, Che Sapete by Mozart, Mr Collins moved over to sit closer to Darcy.

“May I ask you a question, Mr Darcy?” Darcy looked at Collins as if he had just lost his mind. Talking whilst Lizzy was playing was a crime punishable by death. Everyone knew not to talk when either Georgiana or Elizabeth were performing.

“It is very important, sir. I would not normally interrupt your wife’s very beautiful playing but it is of a most delicate matter.” William Collins looked at his host hopefully and seeing his expression soften slightly, he continued. “As you know, my son was born a week ago. Charlotte and I have been wondering if you, sir, would do us the great honour of being his…his godfather and namesake.” Mr Collins stopped and got ready for the verbal blow that was about to come his way.

Mr Darcy just looked at him, blinked and turned away. He looked towards Lizzy who had just stopped playing in time to hear what her cousin had to say. She looked as surprised as he did. They both knew that this would mean having to see Lady Catherine again. No, he could not do it. He wouldn’t subject Lizzy to her once again.

“I don’t know, Mr Collins. I believe I shall have to talk about it with Elizabeth.” Darcy never took his eyes off Lizzy who was smiling at him across the piano. Mr Collins felt his heart sink into his shoes.

“I perfectly comprehend your meaning sir. Is that the time? I think I shall be retiring now if that is alright with everyone. I will talk to you in the morning then, Mr Darcy, Cousin Elizabeth.” He bowed formally in front of them and walked to his room. That had not gone according to plan at all.

“I think that you should perhaps reconsider the decision I know you have already reached in that head of yours.” Lizzy walked behind him and wrapped her arms around his waist. She was clad only in her nightgown, he in breeches and shirtsleeves. These were the best times of day to him, just being in their private chambers, wearing what they liked (if anything) and just talking and being with each other. He placed his hands over hers as he stood in front of the fire. He could feel her rest her head against his back.

“You know me too well, Lizzy. There are reasons why I can’t do it. You know what they are as well.” He turned in her arms to face her and looked down. The firelight played in her beautiful eyes. He would have given her anything at that moment.

“I can stand to talk to Lady Catherine, even if all she is doing is abusing me. I really do think you should reconsider.” She ran her hands up his chest in the way he liked best. He closed his eyes for a few seconds, savouring the feeling of her touch through the gauze of his shirt.

“I don’t know, Lizzy, it seems too much to ask. And why me? Why must the child be called Fitzwilliam and not William like its father? I don’t like this, Elizabeth.” She stopped her hands and began to unbutton his shirt. His breathing rate began to change.

“You have a wonderful name for a young boy and I think that having you as his godfather will improve him. If left to the devices of his father, what kind of a man will he turn out to be?” He looked straight into her eyes and saw her pleading with him.

“Very well, I shall be his godfather and namesake but only because I am enjoying your powers of persuasion too much.” He smiled wickedly at her and pulled her very close to him. “I hope you are right about this, Lizzy.” He kissed her. They retired early that night, a decision being made to the satisfaction of all in the house.

When Mr Collins returned to his room, he quickly found the letter that had inspired him to take the trip in the first place. The letter from Mr Bennet had come all this way with him. He looked at it in his hand and thought to himself. He had been so sure that Mr Darcy would have agreed to be his son’s godfather. How wrong he had been.

“What will Charlotte have done? Could she have asked and he accepted then? I shall return to Hunsford tomorrow and look after young Collins while she rests. All will turn out well in the end.” He placed the letter on the side table and looked out of the window. This he had wanted more than anything, more than he had wanted a wife and more than he had ever desired his cousins.

The night passed quickly and soon it was time to go down to breakfast. There he would tell the Darcys that his visit had to be cut short and he must return home that morning. As he walked down the grand staircase and neared the breakfast room, he heard voices. Slowing so that he could hear what they were saying, he smiled at their words.

“So, are you prepared to brave my Aunt’s displeasure? I am sure you will be able to handle her, Lizzy, but do not be too affronted. I fear she could be ten times worse than ever before.” Mr Collins could hear the couple laughing together and then Elizabeth spoke up.

“I think I can withstand her for a couple of days. It will be worth it to see Charlotte again and the soon to be named Fitzwilliam. I am glad you changed your mind.”

“It was thanks to your methods of changing my mind that I acceded to this request. If you were a weaker woman, Lizzy, one, I wouldn’t have married you and two, I would have to kill Lady Catherine myself. She has been far too cruel to you. One day she might see beyond material matters and see why I married you.” Darcy’s voice was soft and full of love for his wife. It was then that Mr Collins decided to make his appearance.

“Good morning, Mr Darcy, Cousin Elizabeth.” Bowing formally he took some of the offered breakfast and sat at the table, near Lizzy for he was still slightly in awe of Darcy.

“I have some good news, Mr Collins,” began a smiling Darcy. “It would be a pleasure to be godfather and namesake to your son.” Mr Collins nearly leapt out of his seat to thank him. He shook Darcy’s hand very firmly and then turned to Elizabeth. Lizzy nearly lost it when she saw her husband wipe his recently shaken hand on his napkin with a mild look of distaste.

“Mr Darcy, that is good news indeed. Charlotte will be so pleased, I am sure. The service will be held at Hunsford obviously and should be very soon indeed. When you are available to come to Kent the ceremony shall be performed then. You may stay at my humble abode during your stay. You aunt may be less than willing to see you.” He smiled at Darcy and then at Lizzy.

“Yes, my aunt. That was a reservation last night but I trust my wife to be able to handle her sufficiently well. You shall name the date Mr Collins, I shall be at your disposal on this matter.” Those were the famous last words.

Three days Later – The Church at Hunsford

Darcy and Lizzy were stood at the front talking to Charlotte and admiring the squirming babe. Both hoped that the youngster favoured the mother rather than the father. Charlotte was thinking along the same lines. She had become to admire Mr Collins, though. Life really wasn’t that hard after all. They all turned when they heard a commotion outside.

“Is my nephew and that country nobody of his in here?” The shrill and piercing voice of Lady Catherine de Bourgh was heard by all. Lizzy walked towards the noise, her husband keeping slightly behind her all the time. Lady Catherine entered the church and stared at her new niece.

“Lady Catherine…” Lizzy spoke but was soon overshadowed by her voice once again.

“Mr Collins, you didn’t tell me that the likes of these people would be here. I am most seriously displeased.”

William Collins stood before, rose to his full height and began to talk. This is was not to happen on such an important day.

“Lady Catherine. My cousin and her husband are here at mine and Mrs Collins’ request. You shall be civil to our guests on a day such as today.” She was affronted. Mr Collins, the slimy idiot that had always obeyed her every word had stood up to her. She looked around the room and saw that everyone else was in shock as well.

Mr Collins turned to look at everybody else and asked them to get ready for the service to begin. Lady Catherine was in for more of a shock when she realised that her ex-nephew had been chosen to be godfather *and* namesake.

So that was it. Fitzwilliam Collins was christened that day and Lady Catherine was so much in shock that she actually began talking to Lizzy once again. This shocked Darcy at first, then he too began talking to her. Lizzy walked over to Mr Collins, leaving her husband to talk to his aunt.

“It has been a wonderful day, Mr Collins, and young Fitzwilliam is adorable. I think my husband and I have a great deal to thank you for. I have been trying to get him to talk to her for a while now. You have been such a help.”

“It is alright, Cousin Elizabeth, I had planned it so myself. My noble patroness was very upset at first but I think she missed him really. I hope that you are happy as Charlotte and I are. You and Mr Darcy seem to be of one mind as well. Your felicity in marriage is as happy as mine I feel. I hope that soon you will have a young Fitzwilliam running around your most splendid home too.”

“I thank you, and the planning was excellent. I think we could get on very well, cousin.” Lizzy smiled at Mr Collins before returning to her husband once more.

He was very pleased with himself. In one day he had secured the happiness of his beloved son and reunited the two families he cared most about. Yes, today was a good day indeed for William Collins, vicar of Hunsford and proud father and husband.

Copyright held by Sophie - 2003