Purple Nightmare

by Bunnytales

October 2003, Witching Hour Challenge

Rated PG

Author's Note:Halloween comedy, with a hint of pumpkin spice.

“Dr. Bennet I refuse to put on that costume” !

“ Dr. Darcy the children are depending on you, not to mention all the psyche ward patients as well”.

“ Dr. Bennet did it ever occur to you that that costume is the reason for all the psyche patients”.

She stuck out her tongue at him. In the past year that they had been dating they had very few arguments. Dr. Elizabeth Bennet was in pediatrics, and Dr. William Darcy in psychiatrics. The hospital Poole was up to $5000.00, that they would get married before thanksgiving. Of course Elizabeth’s sister the newly married Dr. Jane Bingley was the one who started, it in the first place.

“ Do you want to disappoint all the children on my floor”?

“ Why don’t you wear it, since you chose it”.

“ Dr. Darcy if I appeared in that costume with breasts, the rest of your staff might just check themselves into your floor. And my children in peds, would come to you in their teen years for therapy”.

He sighed , it was obvious that he was not going to win the argument. He sneered at the costume as he took it from her hand. He bowed his head and scuffed his feet all the way to the Men’s changing room. As he shut the door Elizabeth could not help but laugh, he really was being a good sport about it.

She looked at the clock knowing she needed to check the decorations. It had been Jane’s idea to decorate the lounge as a haunted house. As she looked around she noted that the cemetery headstones had the names of people who had cut their funding. She felt it quite appropriate. The full moon which was made out of a paper lantern hung in the middle of the ceiling. The pumpkins that the children carved for the contest were on the table each with a candle inside it.

Some of the parents had begun to show up bringing Halloween goodies for all the children. She looked at the chocolate cupcakes making sure to set two aside for Dr. Darcy and herself. She told the nursing staff that it was time to bring in the children in for the party. She left to drag Dr. Darcy out of the changing room.

Charles Bingley Jane’s husband was an affluent lawyer and Dr. Darcy’s best friend. He had helped Dr Bennet pick out the costume and had brought his Polaroid to take pictures.

“ Dr. William Darcy come out of that changing room”!

“No’” !

“ If you come out you can have a chocolate cupcake that I saved for you”.

“ Dr. Bennet that is hardly playing fair, you know I have a weakness for cupcakes, especially chocolate ones”.

“ Please come out”.

He stepped out of the changing room, and got his picture taken.

“ Charles you...! Give me that camera”.

Charles started to run knowing that there would be hell to pay if he got caught. Darcy chased Charles into the main hallway. They passed by Dr. Jones who had just finished up a fourteen hour surgery on a cardiac patient. He took off his glasses to clean them when he saw a gentlemen with a camera being chased by a purple dinosaur.
He put his glasses back on and decided that he really needed to get some sleep and a stiff drink.

Charles had finally escaped, and Dr. Darcy walked back towards pediatrics dejected. Elizabeth arched her eyebrow as he came in.

“ Are you ready yet Dr. Darcy”?

He stood looking at his purple feet.

“ I hate you”.

“ I know”.

She smiled and then began to laugh. She took his purple hand in hers and led him towards the lounge. The kids eyes lit up as they saw him.

“ Hello boys and girls happy Halloween” !

“ Barney” !

The little kids came up to hug him. He was the guest of honor. Barney judged the pumpkins, sang songs and passed out party favors. The children began to file out slowly with their bags of candy and smiles on their faces.

Barney sat down on a chair.

“ Why don’t the children on your floor smile like that at me when I am not in costume”.

Elizabeth and the rest of the staff had finished cleaning up. She walked over and placed a kiss on Barney’s nose.

“ Because you are much scarier then a purple dinosaur”.

She gathered up the last of the party favors, while he went to change. She put them in a box for Dr. Darcy to pass out to his patients, since he was on call tonight for two hours.

“ Elizabeth the zipper it is stuck and I have to pee”.

“ Come on out and let me see if I can loosen the zipper”.

She struggled but it was all in vain. The zipper simply wouldn’t budge, and what was worse is he was being paged.

“ You’ll just have to hold it”.

He asked her to walk with her up to his floor. She agreed and carried the box with the left over party favors. As they walked in they were greeted to a most interesting sight. Nurse Jenny Johnson was talking to a patient trying to get him off the table. He wore a yellow stained bed sheet cape around his shoulders. He had the letter S on his naked chest done with ketchup. And he wore white bikini briefs. Dr. Elizabeth Bennet didn’t know weather to laugh or cry, at the scene in front of her.

Fearing for his patients safety and forgetting that he was in costume, Dr. Darcy approached the patient.

“ Mr. Collins please get down off the table” !

He looked at the purple dinosaur in front of him and climbed down crying. He crawled over to the dinosaur.

“ Please don’t eat me. I’m all skin in bones”.

Nurse Jenny and Elizabeth were trying not to laugh at the almost naked man in bikini briefs ( who knew they made them that large), cowering before Barney the dinosaur.

“ I’m not going to eat you. I am here to help you. Why don’t I take you back to your room”.

“ Can we sing”?

“ Of course, any song you like”.

“ I love you . You love me we’re a happy family”.

Elizabeth could not even begin to imagine what he was suffering ( Dr. Darcy that is ). The purple dinosaur came out a few minutes later requesting that the patient be given a sedative. Nurse Jenny went to get a big needle. Barney offered Dr. Elizabeth Bennet his arm and they walked out, since his shift was ending.

Since the costume was still stuck on him. Elizabeth drove them back to his apartment. He asked her to come in, she readily accepted. His Landlady Mrs. Crabapple could not believe the sick fetishes that some of her tenants seemed to have.

He walked in and turned on the lights. He helped Elizabeth to the couch and made sure she was comfortable. He then excused himself for a few moments. She looked at herself in mirror above his fireplace, fixing a few wispy strands of her hair.

He returned carrying a large box with holes in it.

“ Happy Halloween Elizabeth”.

She opened the package and inside was a beautiful all black cat. She smiled at William and then she noticed it’s collar.

“ William that is... this is “.

He took the blue diamond ring off the cats collar and got down on one knee.

“ Dr. Elizabeth Bennet, would you do me the honor of becoming my wife”?

She smiled with tears in her eyes.

“ I love you Dr. William Darcy of course I will marry you”.

He put the ring on her finger and tried to kiss her. But his nose got in the way. She looked at him and got a butcher knife from the drawer.

“ Barney I have waited a long time to do this”.

“Gulp”

She sliced the zipper freeing her fiancée. She was rewarded as it fell to his knees revealing his naked form. He walked over to her and carried her in his arms to the bedroom.


Epilogue

Elizabeth was stretched out on the bed happily sated petting her new cat and staring at her diamond ring. William came in tossing the Barney costume outside his window. He crawled back into bed and pulled Elizabeth close.

Down below a young child was walking home with his father when he came across the murdered dinosaur. In future years he would be treated for the childhood trauma by the Darcy’s son ...Jake.

Copyright held by Bunnytales - 2003